Do all relationships have to end badly? How do we end a relationship the right way?
We all face that difficult moment in our life when we need to end a relationships with someone whether it is a friendship or a dating partner. Most people have experienced the pain of feeling rejected when someone they liked or loved ended the relationship. So why is it so difficult to have good endings?
To end a relationship the right way you need to start by knowing exactly why you are choosing to end this relationship. You need to be clear with yourself. Is it due to fear of commitment? Boredom? Your friend or dating partner is too needy? You don’t feel any ability to share your thoughts or feelings freely in this relationship? Know your why.
Knowing why you are leaving helps you to see patterns when you end relationships. Are you leaving relationships for the same reasons again and again? Knowing why also helps to reduce the break-up get back together cycle because when you are unsure of the reasons you are leaving you may try to return to the relationship again.
What feelings have changed about this relationship?
If you end a relationship without really thinking about you are doing so, you could be losing a relationship that could have helped you to grow as a person. If you are leaving relationships due to challenges that have come up in this relationship, you can miss the opportunity to learn more about yourself rather than running for the exit. Challenges in relationships can help us to see where we need to grow personally.
How have you chosen to end relationships?
How kind are you when you end a relationship? Think of your history of relationships with others. How did you end any of them?
There are 4 poor ways to end a relationship that many people use that lead to further problems. To learn about these 4 ways and how to end the relationship the right way, click on the listen tab of this website to hear episode #12 of the podcast Growing Your Relationships.
(photo by Kelly Sikkema)