Every relationship at one time or another experiences different levels of stress. The difficulty is when the stress level becomes so high that it impacts our ability to do daily functions such as productivity at work and interacting with family and friends. Think of the last time one of your key relationships experienced stress. How did you react to that stress? What emotions were you feeling at the time? Were you able to locate the source of that stress?
Often times we don’t get to the source of our relationship stress because we are too busy dealing with the pain of having tension in our relationship and the sense of discouragement that our relationship is experiencing problems.
So let’s take a look at the 3 key sources of relationship stress that may be impacting your relationships. These 3 sources of relationship stress are: internal, external and interpersonal. Or what I refer to as: you, them and us.
In order to get to the actual source of your relationship stress, it is important not to jump immediately to blaming your relationship partner for the stress. Avoid rushing to saying it is their fault and they are causing me to feel this way. If we really want to take a hard look at the source of our stress, we need to begin with looking inward at ourself and what we bring to the relationship that is causing the stress.
So one of the first questions that you want to ask yourself is how have I been feeling about myself in this relationship? You want to answer that question as honestly as you can because the goal is to identify and lingering self-esteem issues that you might be dealing with right now in the relationship, that is adding stress to the relationship.
When we don’t feel good about ourself, our negative thoughts and feelings are carried into our relationships with others. Our relationship partners can grow frustrated at this constant negativity and grow tired of having to continually reassure us. That is why it is so important to first look at what you are bringing to the relationship emotionally.
To hear more about this internal source of relationship stress, the two other key sources , and how to identify which of these 3 sources are affecting your relationship, click now on the listen tab of this website (MichelleMCastelli.com) to listen to podcast episode #41
(photo by Kelly Sikkena)