The thought of confronting a dating or marriage partner whom you suspect has lied to you, can be very stressful. You want your relationship with someone you love to be built on honesty and trust. When you suspect someone has lied to you, trust is weakened in the relationship and fear of the relationship ending increases.
Before you confront your loved one, take a moment to look at what evidence you have that they have lied to you. Jot down what changes have occurred in their behavior at the time when you suspected lying. What did your gut tell you was incorrect in their telling of their story? Did they omit some important detail? What details were inconsistent?
You don’t want to confront your partner unless you have written down specific reasons you suspect lying. False accusations can also hurt a relationship and destroy trust.
After gathering your evidence, choose a time and place to meet to discuss your concerns that works for both of you. Don’t try to force meeting at a time or day that is not good for them, or you will start off the conversation with your partner already frustrated that you didn’t listen to them.
Ask them to explain the situation that you feel they lied to you. Use specific questions based on the evidence you gathered.
To learn what you should say in the confrontation, how to protect yourself and whether to keep the relationship, go to the listen tab of this website and click on podcast#27 Confronting a lying partner…..